I have premature ejaculation. Can it be treated with sexual medicines? Where can I get help? Why do I have that? Doesn’t premature ejaculation affect my marriage or the quality of my sex life? These are all questions that almost all men in the world have asked themselves one day.You are not alone.
Before searching for the causes of premature ejaculation, you must ask yourself ‘what does premature ejaculation really mean?’ Maybe you have a wrong definition of premature ejaculation in your mind!
In this article, I am going to share with you the real scientific definition of premature ejaculation and the causes. Then I show you what you must do to prevent it for the rest of your life. If you are interested. Then
Hi, I am Reza Khodamehri, a hypnotherapist, and researcher in the field of mental health. And today I am going to answer all questions regarding pre ejaculation.
Body Gym And Mind Gym
To get success in everything you need to exercise your body and your brain. If Christiano Ronaldo did not practice 8 hours a day he could never reach this level of success.
To deal with premature ejaculation, you must also train your mind and your body.
Here I share with you a model that I developed for my clients who were suffering from fast ejaculation.
Because I am a hypnotherapist, I always see the solution in fixing errors in the level of the conscious mind and the unconscious mind and also the body.
In this model, I used the word Gym. A gym for me is a place that people train their bodies. So why we should not train our minds to boost its performance! It is rational. Isn’t it?
How to treat rapid ejaculation in four steps
Step 1: Premature ejaculation Definition( Conscious mind gym)
Step 2: Premature ejaculation Home remedies( Body Gym)
Sep 3: Hypnosis and self-hypnosis for premature ejaculation( unconscious mind gym)
Step4: Medical treatment
In this article, I used the most accurate research-based article sources. I attempted to write something different than other articles on the Internet. I hope you like it.
Conscious Mind Gym
The conscious mind is where everything takes place right now. Our five senses, such as seeing and hearing are processed by this part of the mind. Our rationalism forms here. Our belief system forms here.
For the treatment of premature ejaculation, we should consider this part of the mind. So if there is any error, try to fix it.
One big error can happen when we have the wrong definition for something.
Definition of things can program this part of the mind.
We might have different definitions for the same thing. So we must be careful.
Because different definitions create different feelings and different feelings create different behaviors.
Remember, the language of the mind is feeling. If we get to know this language then we are able to change Behaviour.
It is very important to pay attention to this language and study it. That’s exactly what we are doing right now.
Definitions come from people
Because of education and culture, humans could reach this position of success comparing to other animals. Without education, mankind can go back to its primitive age.
Let’s leave a human child and also a chimpanzee child on an island all alone. For sure chimpanzee child will be much better to take care of himself in the face of danger and save his life. While the human child will be very fragile and weak and will not be able to live his life without his parents or other people.
This example shows the Importance of education and culture for us.
What if that the education is destructive?
Reading is a good habit. But reading from everywhere is not.
Millions of blog posts with the purpose of marketing are copied from nonscientific websites every day. And after re-editing will be posted on the Internet again. These articles have no values. And also have negative effects instead of contributing. The problem of premature ejaculation is no exception.
You can find rich articles in article search engines like Doaj.org or Jstor.org for free. Some of the articles I am going to use in order to write this article.
The scientific definition is very important
Is there a scientific method, ruler, or Instrument for measuring premature ejaculation? or could everyone define it based on their own sexual experience? In this case, there would be not just one definition but many definitions. Definitions that could vary among different people, nationalities, cultures, and geographical locations.
If we look at it from a biological point of view, we see that most animals reach sexual orgasm in less than 30 seconds. So, they all have premature ejaculation and should go to an animal doctor for treatment.
From a biological point of view, the only purpose of sexual intercourse is reproduction. So we can conclude that orgasm in less than 5 seconds is very normal.
Philosophers and poets have also their own criteria and opinions. And they all provide strong reasons. For example, philosophers and poets raise the subject of love and do not like to talk about sexual orgasm.
Some religions even recommend a quicky. And they consider long sexual activity as a way to corrupt the soul.
Since premature ejaculation is a sensitive topic, we must measure it with a precise ruler so that we do not make a mistake. The slightest error can lead us to the abyss of severe social harm.
PE definition by international society for sexual medicine (ISSM)
After many years of arguing, the association finally published a definition. But according to researchers, this definition has no general basis. And can not be used to diagnose premature ejaculation.
They say that “a male sexual dysfunction described by ejaculation which always or nearly always occurs prior to or within about one minute of vaginal penetration, and the inability to delay ejaculation on all or nearly all vaginal penetrations is considering Premature Ejaculation”
Archimedes says the world is made up of numbers
If Archimedes was right, then we can measure premature ejaculation on the basis of numbers. Here I am going to get help from one of the good scientific research that has done a good job in this regard.
Both people who complained of premature ejaculation and those who thought they had no problems participated in the study.
The secret lies in this scientific research
The study showed that many men who their ejaculation occurs between 10 to 20 minutes also considered themselves as a PE patient.
Participants’ health was also assessed to prevent any statistical errors.
The investigations are as follows:
1. Age over 18 years
2- Couples sexual relationship for more than six months
3- Mental health, sexual health, and body health
4- No addictionon to alcohol and opiates
5 – No history of strong medication or surgery
In this table, we can see well that 80% of men reach sexual orgasm in less than three minutes. And only less than one percent of men can control their ejaculation for more than 5 minutes.
Hollywood, the big Influencer
The result of this article shows the opposite of what we have known and heard so far.
Before we thought that if anybody come in less than half an hour, then he is not normal.
Where did this expectation come from?
Porno movies show a big man having the best kind of sex for an hour. Oh, these guys are very strong.
But in reality, we know that they have all used strong pills to prevent premature ejaculation. And also with just a little bit of filmmaking knowledge, we notice that this sex tape has been filmed on several occasions.
The result of wrong preception
Now, what will happen if a woman or a man sees these films?
He or she compares himself and her husband with the actor in the lead role of that film. This is where the destruction begins. The wrong expectation that could destroy the foundation of the family.
An important point for the female reader of this article
Female readers may think of what I concluded sofar as misrepresentation or exaggeration. Or they still believe that women’s sexual satisfaction depends on men’s sexual performance. But they should consider that sexual satisfaction is a multifactor topic and many variables play a role.
In the first part of this chart, we see that men expect more control over their ejaculation time. But their partners expect not that much. This suggests that men may be watching more pornographic films.
In the next column, we see that women complain more about their husbands’ premature ejaculation. This shows that they see their dissatisfaction as dependent on the sexual performance of their husbands.
This is probably one of the biggest complaints of women in their married life.
Why can’t my man bring me to orgasm?
Sexual desire is one of the strongest mental and psychological instincts of living beings. So a successful marital relationship can play a key role in sexual health. And premature ejaculation can be considered a big indicator of relationship problems. But this is not that much easy
Other questions may arise in this regard that requires further consideration.
Do men have to always satisfy their partners?
how many women can reach orgasm with just sexual penetration?
How much do porn movies play a role in cultivating women’s expectations?
How likely are women can experience orgasm in normal sexual activity?
Does the size of the penis help orgasm?
How can women maximize their chances of reaching sexual orgasm?
What is the men’s duty in sexual intercourse?
These are all questions that I will definitely address in the future. You can subscribe to my blog and I will send you these articles as soon as possible.
In this project, a total of 500 couples were recruited from five countries: the Netherlands, the United Kingdom, Spain, Turkey, and the United States. We can see that the result is pretty much the same as other article.
Frequently Asked Questions in the first part
What is premature ejaculation? An accurate answer
According to many research, the definition of premature ejaculation can be completely personal. And can influenced by religions – media – porn movies – friends – books – Newspapers – sexual partners, sexual dysfunction, frustration, and other factors. Base on scientific research more than 80 percent of men reach orgasm in less than 3 minutes and just 5 percent can keep their ejaculation more than 5 minutes.
How long should a man last before ejaculation?
This depends on the person’s expectation and their sexual partner. In scientific studies, some men reported that less than 20 minutes for them is considered premature ejaculation. While some men reported that ejaculation within 5 minutes is normal and good.
Does premature ejaculation affect pregnancy?
Just entering the vagina is enough for pregnancy. The time of ejaculation is not very important. But in some cases, it may indirectly impact fertility. For example: Premature ejaculation can make sexual frustration, anger, stress, and difficulties between couples. And this may reduce the chance of sexual intercourse which indirectly affects fertility. In some cases, the man avoids having sex to avoid embarrassment. This reduces the chance of pregnancy. In severe premature ejaculation cases, the man may ejaculate before entering the vaginal canal. In this case, the male sexual cells can not reach the woman’s egg and result in no pregnancy chance.
Does circumcision cause premature ejaculation?
According to article number one and number two and other scientific articles, sexual satisfaction, and the severity of premature ejaculation are significantly associated with adult circumcision. The results of scientific research indicate that circumcised men have longer ejaculation time, better ejaculation control, and more sexual satisfaction than uncircumcised men. These findings suggest that circumcision may have positive effects on premature ejaculation, ejaculation control, and sexual satisfaction.
What is the main cause of premature ejaculation?
Premature ejaculation is a multi-factor issue. For example: 1-Wrong definition of premature ejaculation can cause people to think that they have pre ejaculation. But they do not have really. Probably you are also normal. 2-Depression or anxiety, especially about sexual performance. 3-Feeling anxious about being rejected by a sexual partner 4-Expecting premature ejaculation, which indicates a kind of conditioning circle 5-Wrong Religious, philosophical, personal, and social beliefs about sexual activities. 6-Stress before sex 7-Marriage problems 8-Some sicknesses
Control PE, yes or no?
The answer is YES
Sexual desire is one of the strongest instincts of living things. Life would not have been possible without that. And our survival could have been in danger, and man is the only creature on earth who is able to solve big problems. That is what we do right now. To solve premature ejaculation for more pleasure.
Long sex is very pleasable when both partners want that. The good news is: Premature ejaculation is very treatable.
Now if you are interested in learning more about this, please continue reading.
Step 2: Body Gym
In the previous section, you tried to reprogram our incorrectly programmed conscious mind. In this section, you train your pelvic floor muscles that responsible for ejaculation.
What do you do if you need to go to the bathroom but you are not in a situation where the toilet is near you? Don’t you decide to keep yourself?
And you see, it’s not that much hard for you. Why? Because you learned it when you were a child.
As a child, you learned how to train your bladder muscles to hold urine for several hours.
If you were taught by someone like your parents or school how to control your ejaculation. Then you were able to control your ejaculation during real sexual intercourse.
Education is very important.
Now we analyze the impact of masturbation on premature ejaculation.
The negative effect of masturbation on pre-ejaculation:
One of the strongest desires of the mind is to achieve the highest possible mental and physical pleasure in the shortest possible time. As I mentioned before.
Now, Look closer to masturbation.
Masturbation is a kind of physical and mental practice to speed up ejaculation.
During masturbation, the mind uses all the sexual stimuli to eventually send ejaculation release signals to the pelvic floor muscles responsible for ejaculation.
Masturbation is an exercise that some people do on a daily or weekly basis. Now, when these men are in a real situation with a real sexual partner, the exercise they have done for many years shows itself and they experience premature ejaculation.
Pelvic floor muscles control technique in 7 steps
If masturbation is an exercise for fast ejaculation, then it can also be an exercise to delay ejaculation. But this time the purpose is to come late and train the pelvic floor muscles related to ejaculation.
I want to explain to you one of the best home remedies for premature ejaculation. Or in other words, treating unwanted ejaculation.
It is better to do this exercise after reading the first part.
Start / stop technique
Ejaculation management in men and women is an individual skill that must be earned. And personal talent and intelligence can also play an important role.
Many people have this talent genetically. And others have to acquire it by practicing.
This skill is just like the skill of playing football. With more practice, you can become better at that.
You have to be a little patience and continue this exercise for a few months. Then you will see that this skill will become a part of you, and you can do better with each sexual intercourse. Learn to Delay your ejaculation as long as you want for the rest of your life.
Start by stroking your penis up and down. Do not think about ejaculation. Just pay attention to the feeling you get from touching your penis. Do this without any cream or oil and with dry hands.
You may need to create some sexual pictures in your mind to make yourself ready. Do it but then later, get back to your practice. Your goal is just to exercise, not to masturbate.
2- Tickling response
As you get close to climax, pay particular attention to the sensations in your body. Try to feel the ‘tickling’ response that occurs before you ejaculate.
Continue masturbating without trying to last longer or think of anything special. Just notice how your body feels as you become more excited.
Never stop yourself from unwanted ejaculating. That’s not good.
Just very before you reach the ejaculation time.
And let it not happen.
If ejaculation occurs, do not be upset at all and be sure to do better next time. It is very important to stop at the correct time. You can do it better by more practicing and analyzing your feeling.
After stopping ejaculation, start again and repeat this several times up to three times.
5- Controlled Ejaculation
Finally, when you decide for yourself, you can allow ejaculation to happen this time.
6- Continue working with oil or cream
After a few weeks of practice, you can use this time some oil and cream to simulate the real vaginal penetration feeling,
7- Adding your sexual partner
After some weeks of training, you can do this exercise with your sexual partner or spouse. Never rush. Give yourself enough time.
Conclusion Part 2: Bodybuilding Club
If you follow the instructions, you must be able to control your premature ejaculation.
Learning to manage premature ejaculation requires learning to recognize the signals your body is giving you. Knowing when you are about to come, and stop from that point.
Step Three: Unconscious Mind Gym
Certainly, the best weapon to grow in life is awareness.
The more we strengthen this awareness, the better we can manage our goals.
I’m sure that by here you have made miraculous progress if you have done the exercises correctly.
In the third step, we program the subconscious mind with the power of Hypnosis.
Premature ejaculation treatment with hypnotherapy:
Unfortunately, sometimes our subconscious mind makes a mistake and puts us in trouble. And It is difficult to stop it.
The subconscious mind is very powerful and knows many tricks.
Those who are smokers understand me better. How many times did They decide to quit? but after a few days, at the right time and at the right place, the subconscious mind took action and did a smart trick, forcing you to start smoking again.
This happens every day, not just in smoking but in many bad habits.
Many of you may ask why our subconscious mind has to force us to do something that hurts us. The answer to this question needs a comprehensive explanation that does not fit into our discussion today and you can find it in my next posts.
Fortunately, premature ejaculation in men and women can be easily controlled with hypnotherapy. An experienced hypnotherapist is able to do this job for you in one session. You can find a hypnotherapist in your city and ask him or her to do it for you.
Self Hypnosis File
For those who do not have access to a hypnotherapist, I have created a self-hypnosis file. In this file, I tried to simulate a real hypnotherapy session for the treatment of premature ejaculation.
This self-hypnosis file has been very successful according to my clients and they were very satisfied with the result.
You can go here to download this self-hypnosis file.
You can do start/stop exercise and later listen to this self-hypnosis file. It will double the effect for you.
Step 4: Premature ejaculation Medicines
If the previous three steps do not give you the desired result, you can use the recommended sexual medicines to prevent premature ejaculation.
Experience has shown me that if the instructions in this booklet would be followed and done well, the PE problem will be completely treated and there would be no need for medical treatment. But in special circumstances, you can get help from this type of treatment.
These medications must be used under the supervision of a physician. And the description of this article is only for general information.
Premature ejaculation medicines strategy:
Premature ejaculation medicines must be temporarily used and should not be used for a long time. Because they affect the opposite.
They may be effective in the beginning. But the more you use them, the more your body adapts to them, and the more they lose their effectiveness. You could also become addicted to them.
Also, all these medicines have side effects and they can cause serious problems in the long run.
This medicine is the most common antidepressant drugs that can reduce the symptoms of moderate to severe depression. You can find it in pharmacy with a different name like clomipramine, fluoxetine, paroxetine, and sertraline.
They have been used for the first time in 1994 after a scientific study to manage premature ejaculation and male impotence. And the result was successful. Since then, These medications have been added to the list of sexual health drugs for premature ejaculation treatment. This is not Over-the-counter medicine and must be given by a Doctor. So please find a Doctor.
Local anesthetic cream: EMLA
EMLA is an anesthetic cream that has been evaluated as a treatment option for premature ejaculation. It just anesthetizes the penis. You can also find it as a spay in the market.
However, improper use of this cream can cause erectile dysfunction and other problems.
Special Condoms can also be used as an anesthesia agent. These condoms can be obtained at the pharmacy.
Sildenafil or Viagra tablets
Sildenafil controls the erectile dysfunction of the penis. They have no effect on controlling premature ejaculation. It is recommended to use them after using the EMLA cream.
The EMLA cream numbs and sildenafil tablet controls erectile dysfunction.
I should also mention that sildenafil tablets have side effects on heart disease and should be used under a doctor’s supervision.
Mutual understanding and respect and healthy living are very important in the quality of sexual life. Couples need to know their body and the sensitive parts of their body. They must learn to manage themselves in sexual intercourse.
Proper awareness and practice is the best way to treat sexual disorder in men and women.
In this regard, the husband and wife should help each other to improve their marital relationship. They should not think that everything must be perfect from the beginning. Premature ejaculation can be easily treated with the right technique and treatment.
Please give your opinion here and tell me if this article helped you.